“That shirt makes your armpits look great.” In seventh grade I subscribed to the ‘tight tank top under loose tank top’ style made possible by The Gap and several trend-setting pre-teens.  In fifth grade I embraced the gloriousness of hypercolor fabric with a classy tank that changed from blue to pink during the hotness of […]

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There is nothing quite like squeezing your body into a bathing suit when you’ve put back twelve packages of Peeps this season. “You know how your father is, he won’t like that suit,” a mother, sitting on the filthy floor of the Target dressing room, said to her 12 year old daughter every two minutes […]

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Dutch costumes should only be resold on wire hangers. “Let’s push it out of the road and into the church,” said the Michigander.  Yes! Let’s.  As a friend pointed out, I was “lucky there was one nearby.”  Friday was my Jeep’s first day with its new Michigan license plate.  I made it approximately half of […]

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Come to Holland, MI where you can downhill ski in our urban city! I was called out on my consumption orientation yesterday.  I’ve eaten and enjoyed meat my whole life, but during dinner last night I wasn’t sure and my poker face was no help.  I’m not ready to subscribe to one camp or another.  […]

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Maybe next year Apolo Ohno will shave his soul patch. I hurled my body down an icy chute yesterday in a day of luging that just might have made the entire state of Michigan worth it.   In order to luge, you lay down on two big blades and the flimsy hammock that connects them and […]

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